Love the One You're With

So, unfortunately, many of my posts have been about my deep-seeded dream of selling our house and buying another one. This, as we all know, has not come to fruition.

Because of this, I have had one of many epiphanies. If I can't be in the house I want (one that is quiet, peaceful, with lots of property and wildlife and a big space for a big garden), then I need to love the house I'm with. This is obviously the house God has for us for this time in our lives.

There could be several reasons for this. First and foremost, my husband and I have two small children. If we were to take on a project house, which is what I really want to do, it would mean a huge sacrifice in the amount of time we could spend with them. My husband is a stay-at-home dad, and he would be surrounded by an unfinished house day in and day out without the time to accomplish what we need. In a few years, Allie will be six years old and Mac will be four (almost four and a half) and that is old enough for them to actually be involved - in a small way - in our projects. Or, at the very least, to be able to play independently for much longer stretches of time. At this point in their lives, they need us and our undivided attention. I don't want to make them sacrifice them for a house.

Another reason that has crossed my mind is finances. We don't have much debt - our mortgage and two student loans (one medium sized, one small) - and that is great. However, taking on a larger property - even if it is around the same monthly payment as the one we have now - means more maintenance. If we had a property with a long driveway, we would have to get a plow truck. Raising goats and chickens means fences and feed. Growing our own food and hunting on our property (yes, I said hunting - I am currently entertaining this idea as my desire to depend as little on market prices grows) means we need a big freezer. Chopping down our own firewood means we need a chainsaw and a log splitter (unless Shawn wants to go all hardcore and use an ax, but I don't know if he'll be on board with that). There are many more responsibilities in owning a larger property, and these are costs that won't be as big a deal when our two student loans are paid off. But at this point, they would be a very legitimate burden.

A third reason is simplicity. With our children being small, life should also, theoretically, be small. But it's not. It is busy and has become complicated for us. We feel like one - or both - of us is running constantly. Taking on a large property and a project house will require a lot of time. We do not have that time at this point, and neither one of us would want this dream property to become a burden. We want it to be wholly a blessing.

So, all of that being said, it is important that we give our current house our full attention. Instead of pining away for another house (well...I'm working on not doing that; it takes practice), we have decided to fully concentrate our efforts on the house God has blessed us with. It is a good, solid house, and it meets our needs. We have two children, three bedrooms, two full bathrooms. Our living room is large, so even though we don't have a playroom, we still have a lot of floor space for our children to use. Our yard is big enough for our small children to play in, yet small enough that Shawn can mow it in about forty-five minutes with the push mower. It is all fenced in, so we don't have to worry about Allie or Mac finding their way somewhere they should not.

We do have some projects on the docket. The first is a wall of built-in bookcases in our living room. This is our solution to not having a playroom. We have a wall of built-ins in the hallway that connects the living room and dining room. Currently this bookcase is maxed out. It not only has all of our books, but also all of our children's books, games, Play Doh, crayons, coloring books, and puzzles, as well as several display/decorative items. What we have decided to do is make that bookcase the children's domain. All of their stuff, whether used for playing, crafting, or snuggling, will go on those shelves. I also want to frame some pictures of them, as well as some of their artwork, and display it on the higher shelves so it is obvious that this is their space. Then, the bookcase in the living room will be alllll for us. The TV will go there (in its own custom-built spot), as well as DVDs, CDs, and our stereo. So will our books, records (yes, we have records), and the record player. This will make the living room a fully adult space. Of course our children can and will bring toys and stuff in the living room (we're not monsters, after all!), but once they are done playing, those items will go right back out of sight on the hallway shelves. I would not even be surprised if they ended up playing out there sometimes - doing puzzles or coloring, or building blocks. It's a bright, wide space, and it might feel like their own special place.

This spring, we are planning to tackle a garage re-do, a front porch and back deck beautification, and a few other things. But for now, it's the bookcases and some organization to help us be better stewards of this blessing God has given us. Because this may not be the house I truly love, but it is the house God - for the time being or for much more time to come - has blessed us with. And that's okay with me.